5 Ways to Break-up with Stress

Stress is like a partner to many of us, who is always with us, making our lives miserable. But for some reason we are unable to Break-up with it. And you know? Stress is like a slow poison. It will kill your health, your dreams, your productivity very slowly. So let me give you five suggestions from my experience to avoid getting stressed.


1. Know Your Priorities: 
Most of the times we get stressed because we try to do everything. Accept that it's not possible. So please write down your priorities, focusing on your dreams and values. And be strict about it. Learn to say NO to less important things to say YES to more important things in your life.


2. Finish What You Start:
Another very common cause of stress is heap of unfinished projects. Lot's of SMS and Emails to reply, lots of unfinished blog posts (which you left to reply your tweet), piles of magazines and books left half-read (as you started reading another one). As the list grows, so does your stress. So make it a habit from today, to finish what you start. If something can't be done immediately keep it noted under DoItLater category.


3. Simplify Your Life: 
Wait! I am not going to advice you to be Gandhiji, to wear just loincloth. Just think for a moment, which complexity of your life makes you stressed? How do you feel when your more than one mobiles start ringing simultaneously, or all of your inboxes (as you have subscribed to every Email provider available)are flooded with mails, or you surf through 10-15 Social Networking Sites you use? If you simplify these aspects, you will feel much better. Some quick steps:

Use Single Mobile
Use maximum two Email Id (My Recommendation: Gmail + work)
Use one/two Social Networking Site (My Recommendation: Twitter, Facebook)
Get in a relationship (Lol! Otherwise it will make your life most complex)

4. Learn to Relax:
When people feel stressed, what they do is to dive into the pending works, and gets  more stressed within a few minutes. So whenever you feel stressed, stop! and RELAX! Nothing productive can be done with a troubled mind. How to Relax? Well you should find your own techniques, let me give you some suggestions:

• Pray 
• Have a walk (best if you can walk in the nature)
• Do what you love (Like painting, playing games)
• Spend time with your friends and family.

5. Remind Yourself "AALLL IZZZ WELLL!" :
People get stressed because they worry too much. My suggestion is to Stop Worrying and Start Living(as the title of the book by Dale Carnegie suggests) . As Rancho (the lead character in the bollywood movie "3 Idiots" ) says "Whenever you are in difficult situations, facing problems keep your hand on your heart and say AALLL IZZZ WELLL (All is Well). This may not solve your problem, but it will give you strength to look for the solution"

So wish you all a stress-free life. I will be coming up many more ideas on how to deal with the stress.

Faith As Our Currency

Throughout history the currency of many nations and its worth has fluctuated, and at times even become totally worthless. So to put your confidence in a nation’s monetary system alone is to build your foundations on shaky ground. This is where you need to invest in your faith account. And how do you do this? Well, I can only speak from personal experience.

So here are a few tips to enable you to position yourself time and time again for success.


1) Have Faith In God – I personally have faith in the Allah (The creator for the whole world) . And that faith is simply expressed in my trust and a confidence in my creator. So much so that I stake my life and my very existence on Him. In my life I have seen Him supply my greatest needs time and time again that proves to me that He is personally interested in my well being. I talk to Him as my friend and my mentor.

2) Have Faith In Your Strengths – I have consistently needed to identify my strengths and learn to operate in those strengths if I wished to walk in success and satisfaction. The first thing was to identify them. To do this I simply needed to recognize those things that I do naturally and the things that I have a passion for. And then I needed to do them on a consistent basis – ever seeking to improve along the way.

3) Have Faith In Others – Then I have at the same time learnt to delegate my weaknesses. This has been helped by gradually surrounding myself with a strong support network of people who can help me in these weak areas. Mentors are in this group. And the older I get the greater need for these is becoming more evident in my life. These individuals are strong individuals who assist, support and guide me in the daily decision and activity process that make up my life.

So no matter where I find myself in the world geographically or financially, this faith currency is the currency I use on a daily basis, and it sufficiently sustains me.

Try using it yourself, for it is of eternal value

Vocation = Vacation

‘The secret of success is making your vocation your vacation.’ Mark Twain

There have been short periods in my life where I have found myself employed in a job that I didn’t suit and didn’t like. I didn’t stay there for too long, but learnt as much as I could from the experience before seeking out work that I enjoyed. I knew that this was going to be the only way that I was ever going to live an enjoyable and productive life.

I suppose that’s why I am in business for myself now. See, the thing that I really love to do is to create something new. And I suppose that’s what I’m in the business of doing on a daily basis.

I am reminded of my high-school years. There was this one maths teacher, one science teacher and one English teacher who inspired and encouraged this creativity in me. And it was no surprise that during those years that I had those three teachers that I excelled in those three separate subjects.

These days I create books, speeches, businesses and opportunities for not only myself to succeed, but to help others to succeed. And it is in this that I find my greatest joy, and it is in my current vocation that I find myself always on vacation. Work is not work for me – it’s fun, and because I love what I do I work hard and I often work long.

I’m not a ‘Thank God it’s Friday’ kind of guy. I declare seven days a week, as soon as I open my eyes of a morning, ‘Thank God it’s TODAY!’

So don’t be satisfied with second best. Find what you love doing and go do it. If at first you don’t succeed, don’t stop. Just keep trying until you find your vacation vocation.

Curbing The Communication Crisis

A friend of mine has recently been on the other end of someone’s communication that suddenly revealed that what the other person had intended for them to know was never clearly communicated. And because my friend’s persistent requests, in the past, to have the matter put in writing, were never carried out, the end result has been a sudden realisation that what the other party meant and what my friend thought they meant were two completely different matters.

Why the matter wasn’t pursued by my friend voraciously was because the other person was their friend. But that in itself was their biggest mistake.

Friend or no friend, it is so important, when it comes to having a working relationship with another human being, that you put in writing your agreement so that both parties understand clearly their part to play in the relationship before signing, and of course before proceeding.

By having it written down, when there is a disagreement at a later date, you both then have something to come back to, as a third party as it were, from which there can be a resolution of the differences without the maladjustment often caused through emotional distortion, but rather a resolution brought about through the observation of facts.

‘To curb’ means ‘to restrain’ or ‘to control’ or ‘to check’.

Communication is so important. It is the basis of all human interaction and it is for this reason that we must learn ‘to control’ it in a way that miscommunication is kept at a minimum in all our relationships.

Here are what I call the ‘Ten Commandments of Curbing The Communication Crisis’.

These are obviously very relevant to the business and work environment, but could be readily applied to any relationship that you embark upon.

1. Find Out What The Other Person Wants.

It is so important to find out exactly what people want. Do this through the art of questioning and listening. When they answer a question then repeat that answer as another question, ‘So by saying (their answer), do you mean (your interpretation of that answer)? Qualify their answers in this manner and there is less chance of misinterpretation. Take notes or record the discussion.

2. Record How You’re Going To Fulfil Their Needs.

After you have found out what they want, then present to them the way that you are going to meet their needs. So for every problem that the other person has provide a solution. Fit your product or service to their requirements. If you can’t, then say so. If you can, say so. The important thing is that you provide a platform for open and clear communication.

It may take more than one meeting to gather all the necessary information, but stick with it until you have covered all bases. Don’t rush the process. The firm foundations constructed at this level of the relationship will alleviate many problems that could eventuate down the track.

3. Have All This Information Clearly Written Out In Full.

Now from those preliminary discussions, formulate a document that represents both the wants and the fulfilled needs discussed in points 1 and 2. Don’t make it a long and drawn out document. Put it into point form.

4. Allow Time For Both Parties To Review The Agreement.

Time is important. Provide a copy of this document to both parties and give them time to review it in private. Set a date to get back together to review the document.

5. Make Any Necessary Changes Until Both Parties Agree.

Both parties should mark changes where they think it is necessary, keeping in mind that win/win is the best policy.


6. Both Parties To Sign The Agreement And Get To Work.

Once all the changes have been made and agreed upon, have a fresh finished document prepared. And only when everybody is happy with it, both sign.


7. Review The Agreement From Time To Time And Adjust It If Necessary.

Things change. Make it a point to regularly review the document from time to time so that those agreed upon changes can be made without too much fuss.

8. Deal With Any Disagreements Promptly With The Document As Your Reference.

Disagreements happen, so when they do arise pull out the document and see where the disagreement lies. This is not a faultfinding exercise. This is an opportunity to make the relationship stronger.

9. If You’re Wrong, Admit It. Fix It And Move On.

If you’re wrong, as per the document, admit it, fix it and keep moving.

10. If You’re Right, Don’t Gloat. Forgive And Forget As You Move On.

If you’re right, act in humility and know that it is quite possible that down the track you could be the one making the mistake

10 Questions – Do you have what it takes?

I jotted down 10 questions you can use to gauge whether you already have what it takes, or if you need to do a little “work” to get there.

In Jan 2010, I heard Shah faesal (Topper 2009 IAS) say that you either pay the price of discipline or the price of regret. Discipline weighs ounces…regret weighs tons!

With that said, here are 10 questions to ask yourself:

1. Are you disciplined?
2. Do you take rejection personally? What about criticism?
3. Do you bounce back quickly from making errors or failing over and over again?
4. Are you a planner or do you do things by the seat of your pants?
5. Are you prepared to take risks? Moderate or Big?
6. Do you stay focused on one thing and one thing only until the result you want is achieved?
7. Do you have the stamina to keep going long after everyone else is tired?
8. Can you delegate well, or are you the only one who can do things right?
9. Do you wait for things to happen or do you aggressively go after what you want?
10. Do you do whatever it takes to achieve your goals or just what’s convenient?

These questions are critical for you to ask yourself in order to get a true picture of your nature and behavior. What I have found is that successful people are aware of the consequences of not being efficient in these areas, and find other ways, resources or people to manage for them.