The despair of compare

If there is one word of wisdom I can offer you today it’s this: stop comparing yourself to those around you.

The days of keeping up with the Jones or the Smiths are dead and gone. Stop looking at the other guys car, because if you knew the truth of it all, you’d probably be glad to know that you don’t have to pay his monthly lease bill. I have seen it time and time again – especially in tough economic times – the shedding of top end vehicles and full furnished bungalows because the vehicles and properties were never owned by the occupants in the first place. They were owned by the bank.  So stop comparing yourself with others and their stuff.

The only person you should be comparing yourself with is you and your last week, month or year’s performance.

Here are some questions to prime your personal comparison pump -

How far have you come?
What skills have you added to your resource in that time frame?
How much more money have you saved?
How much bad debt have you reduced?
How many credit cards have you cut up?
What have you produced in the past twelve months?
What new mentors have you added to your circle of influence?
What new friends have you added to your circle of peers?
How many people have you positively influenced?
How much money have you given to charity?
How much time or effort have you volunteered for no charge?
Have you grown as a person?
Are you more in love with your spouse and your children than last year?
But don’t’ spend one minute on a comparison analysis with someone else. It’s a total waste of time.

And as someone once told me, ‘If we all put our problems into a hat and then picked out of it someone else’s problems, we’d all ask for our own back.’

Learn to live in a state of dissatisfied satisfaction. Enjoy today, but continue to dream and hope for a better tomorrow. But whatever you do, don’t waste today worrying about what you could have done yesterday. Learn from yesterday, but don’t stay there. Do better today than you did then, and you will be assured of a better tomorrow.

Make it your focus to only compare your today’s efforts with yesterdays – with a constant mission to improve. This will set you up for some hugely successful tomorrows.

And remember this, that to compare yourself with others will only create one thing – despair. Don’t go there!

Iron Sharpeneth Iron, But Sandpaper Blunteth

When it comes to building successful relationships with others it basically comes down to one thing – respect.

And that respect is reflected in the way we relate to the other party. If you or I enter into the relationship with one thing in mind – ‘what can I get out of it?’ – you will soon find that you are building on some shaky ground.

However, if we approach the relationship from the viewpoint of how can I bring benefit to that other person – then you have immediately created an environment whereby a relationship can be developed. In simplistic terms, it’s more about the give rather than the get.

We cannot force others. We must not manipulate. Love says that we must accept people for who they are and provide them time and an environment where they can grow and develop.

‘Iron sharpeneth iron’ speaks of two strong individuals coming together – and through their interaction there is a spark and there is a further sharpening as two minds meet with a common sense of giving at the centre of their interaction.

Sandpaper? Sandpaper tells. Iron invites. Ever been rubbed up the wrong way? Ever been in a situation where the intention of one of the party is to get, and where there’s very little give? There is no sharpening here. There is only blunting. Ultimately there will be no relationship.

So be a giver. Be a sharpener. Add the spark to all your relationships by discarding the sandpaper and by administering only the iron – the iron of love and respect

Bill Marriott’s Twelve Rules Of Success.

Bill Marriott’s Twelve Rules Of Success (Marriott Hotel Group)

He wrote: My father often said, “Success is never final.” After hearing the stories of our Marriott associates, it’s easy to see why this is a great company. Their spirit to serve and passionate pursuit of excellence are the reasons we’re successful.

Based on the core values that formed the foundation since the early days of our company, coupled with my experience, I’ve adopted what I refer to as the “Twelve Rules of Success”. These management philosophies are a simple but powerful part of our culture and create a living tradition of values and beliefs that we share with our associates all around the world.

1. Continually challenge your team to do better.

2. Take good care of your employees, and they’ll take good care of your customers, and the customers will come back.

3. Celebrate your people’s success, not your own.

4. Know what you’re good at and mine those competencies for all you’re worth.

5. Do it and do it now. Err on the side of taking action.

6. Communicate. Listen to your customers, associates and competitors.

7. See and be seen. Get out of your office, walk around, make yourself visible and accessible.

8. Success is in the details.

9. It’s more important to hire people with the right qualities than with specific experience.

10. Customer needs may vary, but their bias for quality never does.

11. Eliminate the cause of a mistake. Don’t just clean it up.

12. View the problem as an opportunity to grow.